I'm glad my hubby turned veg together with me. Now that I'm transitioning to veganism, the sweet thing is preparing to make the move with me. I don't feel comfortable cooking meat because a) I can't taste it and properly will screw it up b) I can't take the smell of meat anymore... its just revolting!

Definitely not.  I am fortunate though because my husband is vegan (and has been for much longer than I have been).  My husband used to cook me stuff like fish when I was omni, though.  Wish I could say I was that tolerant but I am not.

Actually, I really shouldn't say I wish I were more tolerant.  I am content the way I am and luckily I have no reason to cook something non-vegan...everyone in my life loves my cooking the way it is.

Last edited by paprikapapaya (Tue 1/5/10 11:29 am)

I told him if he wanted meat I wouldn't have a problem cooking it for him, but he told me that he wouldn't want me to go against my ethics and that if he wants meat, he'll either cook it himself or just order it at restaurants if he goes out to eat. He also thinks it would be really sad if I went to all that work of making something delicious that I didn't want to eat.

He still eats eggs / drinks dairy and they're in our home, which doesn't bother me (he has given dairy alternatives a try and hates all of them - but at least he tried!). The only part he's sad about is that I'm an excellent cook (tooting own horn, yes I am!) and when I used to cook meat, it was better meat than any he'd ever had before. His parents tend to over cook EVERYthing, so he grew up not really caring about food as anything other than a fuel source, not as something that was really enjoyable.

He did, however, very much enjoy the Italian Feast Sausages from Vegan Brunch, so meat analogs are apparently okay.

When Brian and I first started living together I would cook him hamburger meat, but I stopped because it made me want to die.  I feel the same way about cheese now, it smells and I don't want to touch it because it grosses me out.

when my husband and i were first married 7 years ago i did cook him meat sometimes...it was terrible but i guess i thought it was the thing to do...i stopped eventually. he ended up going vegan though about 4 years ago so it all worked out and now he cooks for me all the time.

my fiance is omni, and he knows that i won't cook it or buy it for him.  i have no problem (well...as in, i don't fight him on it) with meat or animal products being in the house, or with him cooking a steak on the stove, next to my tofu (in separate pans, of course), but buying it or cooking it for him feels, for me at least, like i'm still somehow supporting those products, so that's where i draw the line. 

luckily, my fiance says i've inspired him to eat much less meat (he was never a HUGE meat eater anyway and was at one point vegetarian and even vegan for a spell though, unfortunately, that was before i met him), and pork he wants to give up all together.  he's even said that when i move to georgia and we're living together again that he will eat entirely vegan in our home (yay!)

point is, i guess, i think it's pretty clear from this thread that when it comes to some things, people draw their lines in different places for themselves.  i'm at a point now where i couldn't reconcile cooking meat or animal products at all, even for someone else, but i don't know how i would have felt about it when i first went vegan.

Fee wrote:

chop_socky wrote:

I'm curious about you folks who do prepare non-vegan for your partners/children but refuse to touch it-- especially lunch meat, cheese, and the like. Is it more a mental thing than a physical thing? It's never bothered me to touch ferret food, so just wondering!

That's interesting to me too, I never realized how many people were too grossed out to touch it!  But I pick up my dog's shiitake, so I'm probably desensitized to that kind of thing by now.

Yeah, I'm thinking I'm just gross too. I'm up to my neck in ferret poop on a daily basis, and that's way harder to clean up after than bologna.

I was vegetarian when my husband and I met, and went vegan before he did. He was allowed to grill meat, or cook it in the oven, on foil, but not in the pans we shared. Now we're both vegan, and the same rules apply now as then. You eat what I cook, or make something for yourself. Sometimes I'll make a ton of healthy stuff, and he still ends up eating fries and frozen veggie burgers. I'm not going to force feed him or make two meals. When I have cats, though, they won't be vegan. You just have to do what makes you comfortable and not worry about what other people think!

Last edited by designedtobekind (Tue 1/5/10 2:32 pm)

I do cook him my husband non-vegan meals because his disability has gotten to the point that on some days he is unable to do these things for himself.  However, he enjoys a lot of vegan things I make, and he cooks his own stuff when he is able to.  I figure that helping him to be as independent as possible and to make his own decisions is a kindness, and I wouldn't be a good vegan if I couldn't show kindness to a person who is so important to me.

My partner has been lacto-ovo veg for most of his life, but started eating fish several years ago. He stopped, but recently started again. I will NOT cook fish. I will NOT pay for non-vegan food. That's out of his wallet.

I will make him eggs if he asks, and that is maybe twice a month. (That is, he'll have an entire dozen eggs in a month, eating them 6 at a time. Puke.) I don't know why it doesn't bother me. I don't use a separate pan for it, either. BUT he can't cook fish on my pans. Especially my brand new set.

When I cook dinner, I do not make separate dinners. I make what I want, and he eats it. If he wants to supplement his vegan dinner with fish or cheese or whatever, I have nothing to do with that. I won't clean the dish either, not out of principal, but because it really doe make me ill.

I used to be in a similar situation as the OP. 

Erik and I were a month away from our wedding and had been living together over 4 years when I sprung it on him that I had decided to be vegan.  Since I had always done all the shopping and cooking I knew that left to his own devices he'd live on KD and fast food, so I started making 2 dinners every day... his "traditional" food, and my vegan food.  And from his perspective, me going vegan was a pretty huge change at the time, and I wanted to make it as painless on him as possible in order to earn his support.  It worked.

After a year of being vegan and a few months of him hinting to me that he might like to try my baked tofu, he finally asked me flat-out to stop buying and cooking meat cuz he didn't want it anymore.  He's still omni and eats a small amount of meat three or so times a week, but he aspires to be vegetarian.  We're seeing a dietician together on the 15th and he's intending to make the switch to lacto-veg.

Do feel like you have to coform to what you feel the vegan norm should be.  My husband is not vegan or vegetarian.  He eats vegan at home because that is what I cook and he doesn't cook for himself.  But he has non vegan/vegetarian items in the fridge.  When we worked different shifts I would come home from work and cook for myself whatever I wanted and then I often cooked a non vegan meal for him after that.  Now that we are on the same work schedule I'm not going to spend hours cooking two different meals so I cook something we can eat together.  When I am at my mom's house I often help her cook non vegan foods because I grew up doing that, but my mom cooks vegan for me with no problem.  We all respect each other's choices and no body forces anybody. 

Oh, and my cats are not vegan.  The eat chicken and tuna.

missmuffcake wrote:

My boyfriend is the same way very vegan supportive. Another thing is as I stated in the past I have OCD and am more freaked out about him touching things with 'meat' hands than me who if I touch meat/cheese/? I wash them to the tune of happy birthday a few times!

I tend to hover in the kitchen when my bf cooks because I don't think he's as careful as I would be when handling raw meat. So I watch where he puts utensils/chopping boards and I tidy up/throw out stuff as soon as he's done with anything.